Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Daycare Dilemmas

So we - or rather I - have been slightly MIA lately due to a number of factors: more small home improvement projects, the fact that I start school on MONDAY (holy crap), a baby shower in Chicago, and what has sucked up most of our time - a daycare search.

If you are out of the loop in our saga, part of the original plan was that if we were really surviving on just my salary (which paper calculations say we can) then Suellen was just going to extend her leave for the entire next year, as opposed to returning in June. Well, last week Suellen found out that IPS is going to transition her in to a new Elementary position in 09-10 (a position she's wanted for two years); so, now she pretty much needs to return in January in order to secure that spot. Thus, we've begun looking for daycares.

Now, what I didn't realize is that to get decent infant care, you pretty much need to look for day care spots before you ever get pregnant. Most places have been laughing in our faces when we say we need care in January. Great. We've got a few leads, but nothing we are completely sold on and nothing that's really garaunteed, but I'm going to list our narrow options with the hopes that all you blog stalkers can lend some advice.

Option 1 - The Goddard School in Brownsburg. We have friends who sent their son to a Goddard (not this one) and loved it. He is literally the smartest 5 year old I've ever met (of course his parents are also two of the smartest people I've ever met). Anyway, we liked it. The kids were engaged; the staff was friendly; the place was bright and cheerful. They weren't optimistic about an opening, but they didn't laugh, so we are on their waitlist. They are probably our first choice, but they aren't cheap (around $900/mo.)

Option 2 - A woman who runs daycare out of her home that three of the teachers at my school use. She has an assistant and there aren't any more than 12 kids in the house at a time. She seemed really nice and on top of things, but it is pretty much a one woman show. She may have an opening (and should know soon), but we don't know how we feel about the in-home idea. She is the cheapest at $600/mo.

Option 3 - A larger, privately owned and operated center that is literally right on my way to work. Things here were a little more chaotic then the Goddard school, but it felt like more of a family atmosphere. The staff was much younger than the other centers we looked at, and the woman running it has less education (just a CDA as opposed to a 4 year degree) than a director at a corporate managed center would have. I know that schooling doesn't necessarily mean anything, but it does give me a bit of pause. There is no oversight (beyond state licensing) than what she provides, and the fact that it's the largest center (twice the size of anything else we've looked at), I'm worried that the management might not always be on top of what is going on. This is the most expensive center ($1024/mo.), but it's biggest draw is that they HAVE a spot for January that I can gaurentee today if I prepay the first month. Tempting.

So there it is. Any thoughts?

Monday, July 21, 2008

Crawling out from the dust

If you regularly blog-stalk Suellen or I, you've probably noticed that we've been a bit silent lately. It's because we've been trapped in home improvement land, which is otherwise known as the nesting phase of pregnancy. It appears as though we've replaced sleeping and puking with hammering and painting. Oh Joy!

Here are a few shots - though I took them at night with the flash so some of the color is off.



This is the crib all sheeted and bumpered and what not. While I enjoy our crib, standard attachments don't exactly fit it well. Notice the semi-janky mobile.




This is a shot of the new window valence and 'heavy-duty-light-blocking shade'. Since the sun rises on that side of the house, we wanted to make sure that the baby could sleep as much as possible. The large empty space in the corner will be filled by a glider (hopefully).





And this would be the other side of the room. We're a little bummed that the changing table doesn't match the dresser as well as we'd hoped. But it was about $75cheaper than the poorly reviewed one that came with the set, so it's not all bad. We do have wall decorations, including some shelves to flank the windows, but those are still in the painting stage.




Speaking of shelves, this is the additional shelf we installed in the laundry room to hold all the things we displaced when we clean out P's closet. I'm pretty impressed that we actually got it in level.




And here's the big project - our new wood laminant floors! This is a shot of our living room. We were going to wait to get a rug, but we found this one on sale at the Lowes on one of our many trips there for extra 'fill in the blank' (trim, sealant, whatever).




This is the opposite view of the living room. The wood continues around to the front door, and if you look closely near the glowing eyes of Kitty Maxx, you'll see that we kept the carpet in the study. There was no way we were moving the world's largest book case.





And this is a final shot of the kitchen. All in all, I think it looks really nice. And at least now you know we weren't just sitting around picking our noses. Ewww. We were actually doing stuff!

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Update Haiku

haven't been blogging
in-laws in town laying floor
much dust needs settling

they brought the dog too
both cats living in our bedroom
litter smell fills air

shower was days ago
we are thankful for friends
rainbow without storm

too tried for poem
sleep now
bye.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Friday Fill-ins

Here we go...

1. Oh, I can't wait until I have a a baby. Duh!

2. Milk is the first thing I see when I open my refrigerator. It's normally old and moldy things in tupperware, but I've cleaned the fridge recently so now it's just milk, which Suellen drinks by the tanker truck load.

3. I never leave home without my phone and a pen.

4. If I were a condiment, I would be either light mayo or ranch dressing because you are what you eat, and I eat a lot of those.

5. Tardiness is really high up on my list of pet peeves. It hate things that start late.

6. The last thing I thought of before I went to bed was why am I forcing myself to stay awake just to watch bad television. I do this a lot. I'll crawl into bed and turn on something completely mind-numbing to help me fall asleep. It works, I start getting sleepy, but then I refuse to actually go to sleep before the current show ends.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to finishing a few more P related projects, tomorrow my plans include enjoying a baby shower with all our Butler friends and Sunday, I want to hang out with friends who are still in town and nap, so I can prepare for the floor installation that is happening next week!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Thirteen Preps for P

It's been a busy day today. We spent a lot of time running errands and completing things we need to get done before school starts and P joins us. In that spirit, I'm listing off thirteen things we've already done to prep for her arrival.

1. Repainted. We did two rooms (one of which will be hers) and the hallway. See a previous post for more details.

2. Installed window treatment in nursery. Our crib set came with a valence so we bought a heavy duty rolling shade to block our the light. It might not be the most stylish choice, but the sun rises on that sight of the house and we wanted to keep the room as dark as possible.

3. Cleaned out the closet in the nursery. This closet was previously home to the Suellen M. Sharp Memorial Empty Box Collection. Seriously, we must have had 30-40 boxes just hanging around. There was a short mourning period, but I think Suellen will live with out them. I should also confess that we still have a tiny bit more to do on this one, but I'm counting it done for now.

4. Installed an additional shelf in the laundry room to hold all the stuff we wanted to keep from the nursery closet. This consists mostly of all the new games we've acquired since we started hanging out with Amy and Ben so much.

5. Purchased a new digital camera and rewired the computer desk so that we could actually removed the pictures from it and print them off. This was actually much harder than it may sound since the computer desk is very small and for whatever reason all of our electronics have cords at least 6 feet long.

6. Enrolled in class taught by Crazy Jane. Again, see below.

7. Completed a full scale cleaning - down to toothbrush grout scrubbing - of each bathroom. I'm not sure what this had to do with the baby exactly, but we were on a nesting roll so we just kept it going.

8. Begun collecting diapers. Every time there's a coupon, we buy a pack. It's not like they're going to go bad.

9. Went to a lawyer and set up wills, co-parenting agreements, powers of attorney (both for money and to make medical decisions), a domestic partnership agreement and second-parent adoption papers. Basically we had to spend a great deal of time and money to do what getting married does for your automatically. And, there's still no guarantee that whoever is in power will recognize our wishes.

10. Started filing out P's baby book. Suellen's mom got us one that's a 3-ring binder style in stead of a bound book. It came with an extra "About My Mommy" page so that we could customize it for us. (Note to all you stalkers out there - the book is pink, and I am tolerating it.)

11. Cleaned out a drawer for bibs. This really wasn't that momentus since it actually used to be full of towels but they were all dirty. What will be more momentus is finding cabinet space for bottles and food.

12. Designated specific areas in each room for baby things. I know that we will eventually succumb to baby toy sprawl, It's inevitable. But we have a small house with hardly any storage (no basement, no real attic), and I'm hoping that if we start with a plan, we'll have a better chance of sticking to it.

13. Picked out and purchased an outfit for P to wear on her homecoming day. This was probably the cutest thing we've done. We've been blessed by so many gifts that we haven't really bought anything for her on our own yet (aside from some furniture), so it was nice to pick out some special clothes together.

I think that's it. I was originally going to list the 13 things we had left to do, but that became too negative. As crazy Jane told us yesterday: you need to think of excitement, power and progress (as opposed to fear, tension and pain). And who wouldn't list to a dirty old woman?

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Crazy Old Women Should Not Teach Birthing Classes

Let me introduce you to Jane.

Jane teaches our Childbirth Preparation. She teaches three sessions a week for two hours as session.

She has been teaching these classes since 1977, before Suellen and I were born.

Jane is also a retired nurse. She assisted with her first delivery in 1947, the year my mother was born. My mother is 61 years old. I'm guessing that this makes Jane somewhere in her mid-eighties.

Jane talks a lot. I think she's afraid of silence. I think she thinks she's making people feel comfortable. She's not. I'm pretty sure every one thinks she's crazy.

While sitting in Jane's class tonight I thought of a poem by W.B. Yeats called "Crazy Jane Talks With the Bishop". I'm pretty sure I was the only one in the class thinking that. Here's the poem:

"Crazy Jane Talks with the Bishop"

1933

I met the Bishop on the road
And much said he and I.
"Those breasts are flat and fallen now,
Those veins must soon be dry;
Live in a heavenly mansion,
Not in some foul sty."

"Fair and foul are near of kin,
And fair needs foul," I cried.
"My friends are gone, but that's a truth
Nor grave nor bed denied,
Learned in bodily lowliness
And in the heart's pride.

"A woman can be proud and stiff
When on love intent;
But Love has pitched his mansion in
The place of excrement;
For nothing can be sole or whole
That has not be rent."

Now, admittedly, I didn't really remember much beyond the title while sitting in class, but I did remember it was about some crazy chick named Jane. However, when I looked up the poem at home, I found it even more fitting.

As you may notice in the poem the bishop warns Jane that perhaps she hasn't been living the most pure or chaste existence, and perhaps she should start thinking about the fate of her soul. Jane, having a sorted sexual past, is quick to retort that the very acts the bishop is reprimanding her for are in fact the culminating point of a love between two people. Without boring you with an English lesson, it's a poem about sex.

Which is good. Because sex is all retired nurse turned childbirth educator Jane wants to talk about.

Allow me to give you a few choice Jane quotes:

"Mothers you must know about spreading your legs apart. It's how you got pregnant in the first place."

"Dads don't you worry about her being as big as the Grand Canyon forever. It'll change back. I know it's a concern."

"If you are doing dishes, you can still practice the pelvic tilt (here is when she begins thrusting against the table). Just do what got you pregnant in the first place."

Eww. And I have three more weeks of this.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

More stuff for Baby P

I'm not doing particularly well with my blogging every day goal. This is mostly due to the fact I blew out my back last week. If you've read the other posts, you know that I was trying very hard to avoid going to the doctor; however, I did go yesterday. She's pretty certain I tore one of the ligaments that holds the muscle on to your pelvis. Fun times! So now I'm one more muscle relaxers and some large pink pain pill that's kind of like generic Vicodin. All of this is making me feel much better, but it also makes me semi-catatonic. I've spent a lot of time sleeping on the couch.

I did, however, venture out with Suellen today to go to Babies R Us to pick out some gifts for the other pregnant folk in our lives and bought a few things for baby P while we were at it. Most of you who have children already know this, but kids apparently require a lot of stuff. When we painted last weekend, we stuffed all of P's accumulated gifts into her closet and I think things are now spilling out the door. And we've only hit 2 of the 5 baby showers being thrown for us! Don't get me wrong, I appreciate all the gifts, but I have not idea where we are going to put everything.

Fortunately, P's dresser was waiting on the porch when we got home. It looks very nice (pictures will come later), and only took three hours to assemble! Of course, part of that time was spent unscrewing all the pieces I screwed the wrong screws into, a mistake I made during not one, but two separate steps. Seriously, why do you need to have 13 different types of screws? I mean there must have been three separate styles of 3/4" screw. Why not stream line that? I'm sure spending three hours hunched on the floor screwing, unscrewing and rescrewing screws into 'oak-like' pressboard was not what the doctor order for my back, but hopefully we can get better organized now.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Mission Accomplished...kind of

If you've been to our house recently, you know that there is a large 'master summer to do list' hanging on our fridge. It contains basically everything we need to do before P arrives. While neither Suellen nor I actaully did much of the work this past weeked, we did accomplish repainting the office/guest room, the baby's room and the hallway, all thanks to Suellen's sister Stacy. Here are some shots, but both rooms are still in progress (i.e. we haven't rehung things or decorated yet).



This is the new green (officially called 'Summer Rapture') in P's room.







This is the room formerly known as 'orange' (if you've been to our house in the last two years, you know what that means). We squeezed the twin bed in here with the computer. It does take up a good deal of space, but it's the only place we had for it.



And this is the new hallway color, albeit it's not much different than the old color. We made the drastic move from 'cream' to 'beige' (or 'Baked Brie" as Lowes would call it).



I think that's all for now. My back is feeling better thanks to some leftover muscle relaxors from a previous injury and a good dose of ibuprofen. It still flares up a bit everytime I do something for more than 10 or so minutes, but I'm getting kind of bored laying around. Perhaps I soon feel good enough to tackle another project of the list.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Oww!

No post yesterday, partly because we had the modem disconnected while painting and partly because my back is still wrenched and I am in a good deal of pain. I know I should go to the doctor, but I'm going to spend another day convincing myself it will go away. Then I'll give up and go in. Great logic huh?

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Thirteen Irrational Fears

So in the spirit of my blogging friends who do these things, I'm doing a Thursday Thirteen. Granted, I'm not really sure what a Thursday Thirteen is officially, but I've gleaned that it's just a list of thirteen somethings. I mean it's not rocket science.

Anyway, here thirteen irrational fears I have about the baby. I figured it would be good to vent them.

1. That the baby will actually be a boy.
2. That the baby will not be healthy.
3. That the baby will be ugly (Suellen has caused this fear because she's certain our ultrasound pictures showed a hooked nose).
4. That the baby will be a unhealthy, ugly boy. This is kind of the trifecta of the first three fears.
5. That the baby won't love me.
6. That the baby will love me, but will then grow up and start following some cultish religion that teaches her she can't love me causing her to stop loving me.
7. That the baby will like pink girly things. Barf-o!
8. That the baby will cause us to become even more broke than we are (which will probably happen), and that I will have a massive panic attack as a result (also a good chance of this).
9. That the baby will get pregnant while still in high school. This is a new one that suddenly came to me in the car last night.
10. That something extraordinarily crazy (tornado, plague, sci-fi like virus epidemic a la Michael Crichton) will hurt the baby and I won't be able to stop it.
11. That the baby will suck up my entire life (again, this will probably happen).
12. That the baby will suck up my entire life, and, despite my best efforts, I will come to resent her for it (I hope to God this doesn't happen).
13. That I will do something stupid that results in hurting the baby, like mistakenly feeding her poisoned plants or bad cheese or something close to that.

Ok. I feel better now. Well, spiritually and mentally at least. Physically, I'm in a great deal of pain because I managed to pull my back, get this, throwing out a toothbrush. I know that's not the real reason - the real reason is that I spent all morning on my hands and knees cleaning the bathroom, including scrubbing the hard to reach places with said toothbrush. So, the garage didn't get cleaned today like anticipated, and we are a little more behind getting ready for Paintfest 2008, which is how we are spending our 4th. But, Suellen's sister Stacy is due to arrive soon, and she's a hoss; so, hopefully she can help me finish moving the furniture. Woo Hoo!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Our very first P-Day

So the memory that's been on my mind a lot lately is the very first time we went in to try for P (which is what we are calling the baby right now).

Sidebar - I was apparently confused about whether or not we were telling people the name Suellen and I have picked out. I thought we were, but we are not. This has landed me in a bit of hot water; so, if you want to know any other name hints, talk to Suellen. I'm not saying anything any more.

Anyway, we first started trying back in June of 2007, which for us really meant a lot of meetings. And interestingly enough, a large discussion about whether or not Suellen was immune to Rubella (blood tests were taken, screwed up, taken again, shots were given, it was not a fun time). So, we had finally arrived at June and were ready to give it a go. We had picked out a donor. He was a dancer with blond hair and blues eyes (like me - the hair and eyes, not the dancing) and didn't have any family health issues. Of course, we had picked him, had him shipped on ice, and then decided we didn't like the fact that he was short and skinny. But, we figured we'd try (you can't really return it), and if it worked then it was meant to be, and if it didn't, then God was giving us a chance to change. None of this really has anything to do with the story.

So, it's June. The nurse comes out into the waiting room and calls us back. Suellen has to double check and sign that the vials match what she order, and then it happens. The nurse hands me the vial of baby juice to 'keep warm'. Eww. While I am pleased to be part of the process as 'baby juice warmer', this completely weirds me out. But we keep walking down the hallway and arrive at the exam room, all the while I am holding this little vial of pink-dish-soap-looking baby juice in a vice grip for fear that it might suddenly get a chill. The nurse ushers us in to where Dr. DHM has readied several instruments that look more painful than I want to think about, including some that light up, and leaves.

So here I am, holding the baby juice, squinting at it, trying desperately to decipher whether or not the swimmers are even in there while Suellen gets on the table, feeling quite squeamish and very nervous. Then Dr. DHM comes in. There is a small amount of explaining of the procedure, none of which I actually understand, I hand over the juice and pick up Suellen's hand, and Dr. DHM starts to do her thing.

Then this little thing clicks in my head. I am scared shitless.

Don't get me wrong, I'm being supportive. I'm standing there, telling Suellen it will all work out. But in my head, I'm doing one of those slow motion movie moments where the hero leaps across the table screaming 'Noooooooooooooooooooo' and knocks the world-ending device out of the villian's hand. Yeah. That's me. In my head, crazy light up torture devices are flying everywhere.

Of course, I'm really doing nothing but standing next to Suellen, holding her hand and looking awkwardly at the floor.

Needless to say, we did not get pregnant that try, which means we will not have a freakishly small dancer baby. (hahaha - "Tiny Dancer Baby" - oh Elton John how I love you). And, I was not nearly as scared for the other attempts. In hindsight, it's probably better that I had a little extra time to get mentally ready.

Now I need more time to get physically ready. Tomorrow's to do list involves, cleaning the bathrooms, moving furniture for painting, buying the paint so that Suellen's sister can help us this weekend, and cleaning out the garage. Yikes!